#52SmallThings

I’ve been following The Mighty for a little while, because the posts ring SO true to home for me and the entries truly resonate with me.

Today I notice a challenge that was posted for 52 Small Things – a year long challenge to get into habits, which is something I’m sorely in need of. I even joined the community in order to take part with people I could likely connect with more.

Nope. Technology strikes again. I wrote the entry, hit “post”, assigned a user name to myself, aaaaand….. blank screen. Just white. Nothing there. No words, no submission, no nothing.

I tried to comment on the post – and same thing. The site kept telling me I was logged out, when I clearly wasn’t judging by my face in the top corner of the page. I gave up. Obviously there’s a glitch in the Matrix somewhere.

I was frustrated, but then realized there’s no reason to be. I have time to rewrite it. That’s all I have, really, is time. Sitting. Because today is a bad brain day, and I’m sitting and watching movies to avoid dizzy brain space from taking over again. Like it did first thing this morning, and nearly landed my ass on the floor.

So here I am, writing it again. But on my own blog, because I think it’s a good thing to take up. Without judgement or expectation, and no beating myself up for not sticking with it. I’m gonna try, and that’s the best I can really do.

They have goals to follow, but there are some that I really need to pick up for myself first. These aren’t New Year’s resolutions – they’re self care goals.

Week 1: EYE MASK
I have a chalazion on my left eye that I’ve been treating with heat packs since my eye appointment in November. I was instructed to do this for 1-1.5 hours a day, and I was doing really well. For awhile. That habit dropped entirely for a couple of weeks, and I’ve been good about doing it daily again. But only twice a day. I need to get this thing dealt with, which means I need to take care of it more often. I makes my vision blurry for at least 15 minutes after each treatment, which takes away quite a bit of time from seeing. But there are many things I can do without proper vision. No more excuses. And who knows – maybe if it gets smaller it’ll help reduce my double vision. My care team doesn’t believe it’s the cause of it, but I’d like to think they might be wrong.

Week 2: DRINK. MORE. WATER.
I’ve been waking up early and not ready to get out of bed. Three a.m. is not conducive to movement. But if I drink water, I need to pee, and I don’t want to have to get out of bed yet, but then I spend too much time laying there after and by the time I do get up I’m struggling with dizzy spells and it starts the day of horribly. It’s time to fix that.

Week 3: YOGA.
I have too many bad excuses why I’m not practising more, and too many reasons that I should be doing it more. I have been practicing, but not as much as I’ve wanted to. I really need to drink more water to combat the dizzy spells before performing asanas, so I can sweep the animal fur up before placing my mat down. But by the time I get enough water in me it’s the afternoon, and I need food, and practicing with a full stomach is uncomfortable, and by the time I’m ready to practice I forget about it. Thankfully, I have a robo-vacuum on the way, which will take care of the sweeping issue, and if I can get my water drinking habit handled then I really have no good excuse to skip it.

Week 4: SELF MASSAGE
It’s good to increase blood flow and and lymph flow, as well as moisturize my poor, dry, malnourished winterized skin. Without the threat of getting the hose if I don’t follow through. It’s a habit I’ve sorely fallen out of, and picking it back up has been a struggle. Once a week shouldn’t be hard to turn into once a day.

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