Little Things

Sometimes having the most simple thing can make everything seem just that little bit better.

Right now, that thing is fresh ginger and tumeric tea. Nothing fancy. Just that tiny bite of the tongue from ginger and the rooty, grounding flavor of both of them, with a hint of honey. It’s simple, tasty and warm.

I have 2 journal entries I’m trying to write, and it’s getting harder to do that. Writing itself isn’t so bad – I can type with my eyes closed. But the words are getting harder to find, and proofreading is harder to do, and making things coherent isn’t as easy as it used to be.

I’ve always been wordy, but lately… my words are faltering.

And I’m struggling with it. My left eye has gone completely blurry, and it’s become hard to focus on anything for any amount of time.

But I’m finding ways to makes things work. Minimizing the work that needs to be done, asking for help when I need to, paying attention, being as patient as I can…

Today I expanded my yoga practice. I had been performing very limited poses now and again, but today I did a full 20 minute practice, without standing poses. And you know what I found out?

My body isn’t my own. Well, it is, but it sure doesn’t feel like it.

My joints feel similar to before I started to lose weight. I can’t kneel again, my hips have stiffened up, my neck and shoulders are angry rock corrals. I’ve been slouching for so long to accommodate for the cyst at first, and then after surgery to keep off the painful perineum sutures, that my hips and tailbone feel like they were sun baked and dried out. My muscles have deteriorated and I’m not able to hold poses for any amount of time without shaking.

And you know…. it’s ok. I’m grateful for my body, even as broken as it is. It’s only treating me as well as I’ve treated it for way too long, so the patience is needed. It’s time to be gentle, kind and nourishing.

I’ll get my book written.

Eventually.

Advertisements

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s